Or not in the right places. With Santiago the question has alwas been are you peeing ok because he is the one who cost me two months' pay with a blockage a few years ago. But now Jackson cannot seem to stop peeing everywhere. I do not know what is going on but he has become completely incontinent in the urinary sense. He seems to be pooping normally but he leaks urine constantly now. He also spends most of his time trying to sit on my lap which he never has done in the twelve years we have been together but so I've been using the piddle pads one uses to train puppies and draping one over my lap with a towel on top for him to be able to dry himself off and clean himself up.

But now he is leaking so much that he is just a mess and he will not let me towel him off. He'd rather find an absorbent place to sit and lick it all off himself. Well, ok, he's a cat; he can do that if he wants.

I am waiting to hear from the vet who has treated him all while I have had him and who saw him a couple of months ago and found nothing wrong in bloodwork or urinalysis but I think something neurological is going on--either that or a tumor in some very inconvenient place. He seems less spry than usual; a little hesitant to jump up on things but I cannot tell if he is in pain or even that much embarrassment from being always wet. He does not seem as happy as usual but honestly he has never been an overly enthusiastic cat, so there again, I don't know.

It used to always be hard to counsel people on just exactly when it was time for them to let their animal friends go. I so wish cats and dogs and all the rest of them could speak a little less obliquely than they do. I know that some people would not put up with an incontinent animal but some would but most of them can probably afford to do lots of tests and trial treatments whereas I have no money at all. I am hoping that my long history with this vet will persuade them to let me make payments for whatever we decide to do. I cannot put myself into great debt, though: I haven't the means to pay it back.

Dogs can wear diapers. Why can't cats? I know, feline dignity and all.

I hate this part.

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