Erik (eriktrips) wrote,

  • Mood:

must. stop. thinking.

did work today. now drinking beer to recover from it.

maybe this will wear off but the compulsion to be on top of my game for my exams has resulted in my not being able to just read something and either nod or shake my head and then put it down. no i have to run in here to the computer and type madly about whatever in the article/book pisses me off and what seems promising and what i feel the need to offer a corrective for and there is always something in need of that.

maybe it is a little narcissistic to think i can both determine where correctives are needed and offer them but i think though the crux of it is an acute lack of self-assurance which drives me to argue vehemently and lengthily and carefully for my own convictions and which in fact won't allow me to rest until i've done so and in fact demands that i do this over and over again even if i've argued the same point successfully before.

on the one hand this has resulted in some elaborate pieces of reasoning which i can deploy in my work but on the other hand it is exhausting and engenders a certain aversion to working at all.

and then on the other other hand there is always the gratification of articulating something well. the problem is it never lasts.

  • chapter one is finished!

    The end of chapter one of UndiaGnosed is near. So near you could click and be right there. This entry was composed @Dreamwidth. Feel free to…

  • That took a long time

    So it took a little longer than I meant for it to but here is another section of the autobiography that will never end:…

  • Why the sky is blue is a political question.

    Why it is important to examine our own ideas before we can change the world around us. This entry was composed @Dreamwidth. Feel free to comment…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.