no one in the world has to answer to as much as i do.
if this is a negatively grandiose statement it is so only because i don't know anyone else who holds themselves involuntarily to standards of accounting that no human could meet. i mean specifically that standard of accounting that requires obsessively vigilant thought aimed at an eternal justification that is eternally uncertain because it cannot be given nor grasped all at once and so it has to repeat itself over and over.
the bone of contention is currently that of multiple and infinite articulations as generative of singularities of the falling away of the event of those singularities versus the whole of singularities as a totality. the thing is the infinite articulations of singularities and their equivocal non/sensicality break open any totality but there are certain southern baptist compulsions that want totality and the father at any cost.
not the one and the many but the infinity of phenomenal appearance. the Event as a whole is not whole but rent at all sides by ongoing events and is both their necessity and their unpredictability and their promise.
forgive me for the theoretical shorthand. were it not so late i would stop and explain each thing but at the moment i don't have the time. i am under my own gun.*
*the gun here being absolutely metaphorical. i put aside the suicidal ideation some time ago and it will stay aside as long as i can keep my compulsions under control or at least put to good use. on the back of a tiger indeed.