a measure whereupon between hiss and steel.
watched hockey. baseball was what i was hoping for but hockey is what turned up and i was so distracted that i watched hockey. clearly today was not a day for much work. although i did open my books i couldn't keep any kind of interest going beyond a few pages and then it was to the tv to look for baseball and find hockey for which i don't even know the rules beyond hit puck into net.
but today it didn't matter. i didn't care. i vehemently did not care about anything which alarms me but probably it is hormone lag and isn't it handy to have a vial from which i can remedy this situation. by tomorrow i should be lusting for life again.
for some reason i am listening to this future. i wonder if david is dead.
whoops. now i'm listening to the nightporters. i don't wonder about any of them but all this listening is making me feel -- not old exactly and not lost exactly but i do wonder what happened.