October 1st, 2005


I don't get it

where have things come to this?

yesterday I got a drink made with two kinds of ice cream, milk and two shots of espresso. it was really good but made me a little ill.
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    awake awake

I'm melting I'm melting!!

worst time and place to take a walk in the bay area: anywhere the fog is starting to lift and the sun is coming out to warm things up. 100% humidity is only bearable below 50F. I had to return van gogh to the library this morning--overnight loan--so I had no choice but to stroll through campus at 10:30, trying to stay in the shade because the sunny spots felt uncomfortably like the deep south.

my shirt is soaked. the other day I bought a small packtowel at rei thinking it would be the best thing for wiping my brow on occasions like this. it worked great and is now also saturated. I removed my shirt and am sitting here in dwinelle half naked but it's saturday so I don't expect anyone to come into this particular room.

another annoying feature of this jaunt is that it is homecoming weekend so the place is crawling with boosters and alumni. I mean I guess they aren't that insufferable but they do make it a little crowded.

in a minute I have to figure out how to articulate just why I keep chosing Rimbaud and van Gogh as exemplary artists. I'm not certain I know exactly but must be able to at least hint at it on monday.
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    hot sweaty

what'd you say?

I think maybe if I just keep repeating myself I will eventually explain what it is I want to explain. way the hell too much material for monday but I did at least come to something like an understanding of the van Gogh portion of my obsession and I suspect it might be a bit complicated for undergrads who are not familiar with philosophical discourse. once I have the outline a bit more untangled I will post it here and you all can tell me what you think.

but so I don't have time actually to say anything about Rimbaud other than: Rimbaud? Take everything vanGogh does with paint and apply it to language. I mean there's surely more to be said than that but that's the gist of what I wanted them to get. but then there's the whole "I as an other" line that makes sense in the context of metaphysics and representation but only after a long explanation that I will not have time to give. and yet it is one of the core areas of investigation for this class.

monday is going to be a mess but it could be kind of fun. I hope they don't rebel and attack.
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    working working
mutts earl


I am freshly balded. I was going to let my hair grow a little but I decided I liked the bald look better than the bristle brush growing out look and I did not have the patience to wait till my hair was of sufficient length that hair goop could persuade it to sit down. I don't know now if I'll ever have the patience for that but who knows I could get tired of mr clean.

it's really difficult getting every. single. hair. when you are using flat clippers against a round head. I had to go over and over the same spot several times so that by the time I was done the clippers were almost too hot to hold. I think I might need to check the brushes to make sure I still have some. I don't know that clippers should get that hot if everything is in working order. I oiled the blades but that didn't seem to moderate the heat.

and my right wrist hurts from the repetitive stress. I guess maybe I should stop typing and go to bed. of course with the new haircut I want to go out dancing or rather I'd like to send out my avatar so that I can rest here.

with summer in full swing I'm going to have to remember the sunscreen now. of course october sun is not as intense as july sun and I don't guess heat makes you any more likely to sunburn but still. there is no protecting fog.

yeah I'm sleepy now.
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    relaxed relaxed