March 28th, 2006



note to self:

when taking klonopin before meditating, be sure to counteract with several cups of coffee before commencing to sit.

I'm finding out that I can sleep sitting bolt upright. dreams and everything. complicated narratives. the one good thing is that I can wake up as soon as I realize what's going on.

so now I'm supposed to write. I think another more coffee might be indicated.

I will go over to berkeley a little later to do a couple of things like try to impress upon my many managers and bosses that I need a job for summer. also we have to figure out what to do about this pedagogy website. really I would like that to be my job for summer but I don't think there is enough money to pay me what I really need to get by until august when hopefully I will be teaching somewhere.

but first. wake up. WAKE UP!
  • Current Mood
    groggy groggy


my elbow is getting worse. interestingly typing all day does not do much for it one way or the other but sleeping with it straightened out instead of bent means paaaaaaaaaiin when I bend it. also gripping something and then bending it hurts like sons of witches. right now it is yelling at me for carrying in groceries but my left arm is so weak from not being the dominant arm that it couldn't carry them all the way from the garage to the house (the garage being a block and a half from the house and this is in big block land where 4 blocks=1/2 mile) so I carried them part way with my right arm and now ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow.

if it weren't for the buprenorphine I'd be taking the percoset sandy has offered me but it is pointless to take another opiate while that's blocking all my receptors. as is I can't decide whether ibuprofen or naproxen makes the larger dent in the pain so I've sort of been alternating them unable to figure out if either does much.

I have an appointment with my public health doc in May.

I'm thinking I should take my elbow to the student health center. what will they say, though? "it hurts when I do this." "so stop doing that." other than not carrying heavy things with my right hand, what do you suppose could be done?

for that matter, what do you suppose it is? it first started while I was folding laundry in january and hasn't stopped hurting since. I thought for sure repetitive stress but like I said computer work does not aggravate it while carrying things around, something I don't do any more than anyone else who lives in a place with objects in it, really fucks with it.

I can feel where it's swollen.

I guess I'd better get it checked. I hope it isn't anything to be afraid of.
  • Current Mood
    sore sore