July 27th, 2006


real life day

I've been running back and forth to berkeley and not getting anything accomplished for like three days now. I tried to read stein yesterday evening and *pop*! lights out. my therapist thinks it's psychological. hm.

seriously I will be reading along and I will suddenly get to a paragraph, begin to yawn, and spend the next three to five hours trying to get through the paragraph while succumbing to spontaneous sleep. it's not quite narcolepsy but I do things like drop my pencil or pour my bottle of water on my lap and suddenly I'm like oh, what? did I fall asleep again?? ok we're really going to get through the paragraph this time and next thing is the book falling on the floor.

at 7 I give up and come in here.

anyway that's not how I spent today. berkeley bart had some sort of 'police action' in progress and they were turning trains around so I walked to campus from the next station down, about a mile and a half, and got there just long enough for the sweat to dry before I had to be back in the city for therapy which is suddenly going well although it wasn't going badly before--it's just getting better.

I think I need a day off but I don't know whether to take it tomorrow or sunday. I suspect if I took it tomorrow the following two days would be more productive than the next two days will be if I take it sunday. follow me?

the fog is in. this is one thing making me extremely satisfied. it came so far in last night that it only dissipated from berkeley for about five minutes. I suspect the mission has been overcast all day. ha! all you lovers of the sunny warm mission.

I think meditation would be a real good thing and soon before it too would be an exercise in passing in and out of slumber.
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