things are vanishing. that is i think of something something i want to do that seems promising and fruitful and i set about to do it but if i get distracted by anything even if only for a moment the thing i was thinking of disappears without a trace and i have no idea what i was going to do. this is not so new except for a certain sharpness which is to say things vanish suddenly and completely and even if i retrace my steps i don't find them again. it may be that i am trying to cram too much into my head at one time right now and so i am squeezing out the inconsequential things like thinking hey i think i will go get a cookie. or more frustrating even is when i think of something i want to write about and before i can get myself to the keyboard something happens like i will pet the cat or something and just like that the thing is gone forever.
it feels like a fresh group of very short-term memory specific neurons has been sequestered into doing other business.