Erik (eriktrips) wrote,
Erik
eriktrips

  • Mood:

crisis of consciousness

maybe I blew a neuron speedreading Judith yesterday. am attempting the same thing with
Adorno but keep dozing off, suspended dazed between transcendence and dialectic and idealism and being and never knowing really what he means by any of these words. transcendence of what? being or Being or beings? dialectic between what two terms? not being an Adorno scholar I do not have the background necessary to decode. zzzzzz.

so I just ate a big hunk of chocolate and am now gulping coffee in a last-ditch attempt for attentiveness. if this doesn't work I will give up, go to bed early, and get up early tomorrow and start again.

interestingly while reading through van Gogh's letters I did not feel sleepy at all.

I think I found a way to fit Samuel Beckett onto the syllabus: forego Marx. I had thought that Adorno could make up for no Marx but so far I can't really tell because I cannot keep my eyes open. why is it that reading must be so hypnotic? the quiet whoosh of my computer fan does not help but it is the movement of your eyes across the page that all on its own can put you right out and I do not understand why this is.

must.stay.awake.
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