Erik (eriktrips) wrote,

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learning to live with sunday

I have prepared plenty to say and of course probably even more than that and I think I'm saying the right things insofar as I think it is good to lead them through these texts trying to wring the most content out of them in an understandable way but still the fear has me like the fear always has me.

I took a whole klonopin earlier and it made me instantly groggy but more anxious. this is not right. after waiting a bit I mellowed out but that was unpleasant and unexpected. now though I'm just about ready to fall asleep although I'd like to stay up a little longer and do useless things.

tomorrow I will get up at 5:30, find a way to get over my initial dread (coffee helps this) and put together my background notes for this week and for next week's reading assignment. having showered today and having noticed that the less I shower the less I stink (I swear to you this is true. it's not just my getting used to the stench) I don't plan on needing a shower when I get up.

one never knows of course. I could sweat profusely in bed tonight and need a rinsing off by morning.

while walking back and forth in front of my house which was pretty much what I did after leaving to make copies, I decided to go into all of the weird little gift shops on mission st as I made my way to the smoke shop to look for a fancy lighter which I did not find because the smoke shop is closed on sundays and I just want to ask why a store as overtly sinful as a smoke shop would be closed on sundays and I want a lighter so I can stop going through all the matches in the kitchen drawer when lighting my incense. but so the weird little gift shops sometimes reward a look see and I did find some little laughing buddhas for less than 50¢ apiece so I thought I'd get a couple to sit next to my incense which I will light with my fancy lighter when I get one and so I did and the cat has already tried to knock them onto the floor even before any lighting situation has occured. but what are cats for if not for this.

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