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mush

yeah yesterday's injection has not yet made it to my brain. I am trying to write but suddenly I seem not to know the language nor how to translate my murky thoughts into prose that is less than murky. one paragraph tells me that today is not the day. perhaps I will grade response papers or read this week's reading.

hey. I tried. at least I did manage more than the minimum one sentence.

or I could do one of my other paying jobs I suppose. as long as I'm doing something eventually everything will get done right? or is it rather that we rush to keep up until the day we die and then someone else picks up where we left off?

I hate stupid days. oh well. can't be smart every day. and here I thought that not sleeping through meditation was a sign of life.

one day writing a paper in the computer lab at UW I was seated beside a young man who clearly had been up all night studying as it was the end of the quarter and everyone had papers due of course but he would write half a sentence, stare at the screen, eyelids drooping, and then close his eyes as his head slowly dropped until he was asleep with his chin on his chest. eventually he would wake up, write another half sentence, then fall asleep again. I felt bad for him as surely this paper was due that day or he would have been in bed right then but it was also somewhat amusing to watch. I was sitting there with my walkman and chocolate covered espresso beans. maybe I should have offered him a handful.

sometimes though all the coffee in the world won't help. today I think is one of those times. fortunately my dissertation is not due tomorrow. the good news is I read the last five pages I wrote and it sounds pretty good to me! of course I can't really think so I might be wrong.

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