relievedI know I could look this up. why I probably will even.
I don't feel like doing much though. I'm not sure that hunching over my drawing board drawing little lines and shapes on paper with a high degree of textural detail is necessarily indicated right now. perhaps I should read. although that involves the same sort of concentration I think it would be less in degree.
it's either that or take a nap. I just got up two hours ago. but the weather and the blecchy feeling make napping look very attractive. I hate wasting the time though; there is so much I could be doing!
I will sit now and see what comes up. not that anything is supposed to come up or that is one sits without aiming at anything in particular but anything at all can happen. it's interesting that way in which you don't really know what is going to occur to you while you are trying to pay attention to just sitting and breathing. in some ways the most interesting thing about meditation is not some state you attain but the several and unpredictable states you pass through, or that pass through you. in zen at least, I think this is partially the point, although one doesn't name it as a point because it is essentially pointless in that it does not descriminate between one thing occurring to you or another. you're not supposed to be looking for any particular occurrence or even any occurrence, for it may happen that nothing at all occurs to you but you would still be doing what you are "supposed to" be doing.
that, too, is interesting.
