but you know what? living in a place that is not spotless does not seem to be particularly unhealthy. in fact I bet I'm immune to things that you aren't.
when we move they will have to sandblast the place. well whatever. I'd love to put all the furniture out in the courtyard and do a deep cleaning sometime when I had ten people to help. I'm not good at orchestrating household projects involving more than just myself so it's not going to happen. this is one way in which we really need catherine back.
well so anyway I'm slightly less anxious and depressed now. it will be good to have sandy around again. I don't know when her flight is but I'm easing into that paranoid psychosis that gets you when you spend too much time alone. I mean I need a lot of time alone compared to the average bear but 24/7 for an extended period is not good for me. I start to lose touch with reality. too many things become questionable that I cannot myself answer for.