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om

70 minutes of zen meditation will calm a person right down.

oh and the klonopin I suppose.

I'm going to get dressed, clean cages, grade some papers, go for a walk. the shower might have to wait until tomorrow although I might feel like showering after finishing with the cages.

I have decided that today I will not wear a watch and will try not to look at my computer's clock (good luck with that --ed.) and just do what I do as I do it and not see what time it is till I am ready to sleep. knowing what time it is adds a lot of unnecessary stress to my day: it's ten! I haven't gotten going yet! it's noon! I haven't had a productive morning! it's 2pm! my attention span is waning! it's 3! I haven't accomplished a thing today!

by 6 at least I just give up but until then it's really not a help to know what time it is.

this has its roots in having summer chores to do that we would put off until an hour before the parents came home. the whole day was arranged around trying to avoid something that had to be done by evening. I wish I'd learned then to just get up and do stuff but I didn't have any more will to act then than I have now. less, in many ways, especially overall/not counting this week.

it's more complex than that even but I don't feel like therapy today.

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