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wah

it's overcast, 66F and 50% humidity.

now I know that the weather this reminds me of and that I truly hate is usually 20-30 degrees warmer and 25-40% greater humidity and that usually the wind does not blow at all in any direction for hours at a time

but I hate this kind of weather.

in fact it is 66.6% at valencia and market.

there is, to be fair, a decent seabreeze, but no fog. this isn't foggy overcast that keeps things nicely chilly; it's mid-altitude cloudy clouds that occasionally break and let the sun through making it warmer and more uncomfortable.

I'm really hard to please. yesterday was almost like today except the overcast was fog and so the humidity was higher but it was less than 60F so I was happy.

I think I need to live above the arctic circle.

in any case, for me it was a crappy day to decide to take a walk. I came home soaking wet with sweat but I have to wear a jacket in this kind of weather or I will still get soaking wet with sweat with the additional bonus of freezing to death in the wind.

I hiccup too much. pills get stuck at the top of my esophagus. prozac especially burns and causes belching and gas if it gets stuck there and the capsules disintegrate. I've finally come to recognize the feeling right away so then will forcefully gulp down mouthfuls of water to flush them out. this usually keeps the burning from getting worse but I wonder what I've got going on at the top of my esophagus that things get stuck there.

my ankles have become edematous. I have to go get blood drawn tomorrow to try to find out why. I hope it isn't due to a medication that I have grown fond of--which is pretty much all of them. they itch when compressed--by sock elastic, for instance--and I remember when I used to complain about elastic in my dresses making me itch. once I start scratching my ankles I start to itch in other places. before you know it I am scratching everywhere.

my therapist is going to thailand for two weeks and I am trying not to be that guy who can't deal with life while his therapist is out of town. but she is one of approximately three people whom I talk to on a regular basis: rather a large portion of my social network.




on the plus side, one of my contractees put my invoice through today. if there is any financial justice in this world, insurance will pay my pharmacy claims between now and the time that check comes.

I decided not to carry on the online arguments I started. I do this often. why bother? you just end up annoying people. actually I didn't start the arguments but I did say some contentious things that I no longer feel like following up on.

speaking of therapy, I go in about an hour so am not going to bother setting up any shots now even though I have my shirt off to let the sweat dry. I will have to remove it again when I get back so don't get discouraged.

Comments

( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
daisydumont
Jun. 12th, 2006 11:29 pm (UTC)
i hope the edema isn't anything to worry about. i've noticed my feet swelling more in hot weather than they used to. feh.
eriktrips
Jun. 13th, 2006 05:43 pm (UTC)
yeah swollen ankles are a possible side effect of almost everything I'm on but I don't know what it means. that is, I don't know if klonopin, say, is fucking with my kidneys. I just hope that whatever it is isn't too serious and can be taken care of with an occasional diuretic. I really really like my meds regime and am loathe to change anything.
ridethegallows
Jun. 13th, 2006 04:48 pm (UTC)
I didn't feel like jumping into that argument either (I wonder how many people actually read each other's monologues...), but I did want to tell you that I really appreciated what you said, especially to that "I ain't got no trans struggles!" guy, and your points about linguistic classification.

I have a lot of respect for you, man. Thanks for saying those things.
eriktrips
Jun. 13th, 2006 05:45 pm (UTC)
thanks for the support. some of the things that get said over there just floor me sometimes and occasionally I feel the need to speak up. sometimes it seems the whole ftm 'community' needs to be whacked upside the head--but then, 'tough love' is just one of the obnoxious stances that I hate but which some ftm's seem to think masculinity requires.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )

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