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and so

I must code my ass off today. that's all I really have to do although there are a couple of things I keep putting off that I also need to get done but I will get to those soon just not now.

did I mention my therapist is going out of town for three weeks starting tomorrow? I'm trying hard not to be the guy who freaks out when his therapist is out of town and she's gone away many times before without my freaking out at all but something has shifted and now I'm actually going to miss her. not that I didn't before but. well it's hard to explain but it has to do with parts of me I thought I'd killed off returning a little worse for the wear but returning all the same.

so far so good but I did have a little anxiety attack last night so swallowed an extra klonopin and went to bed. it's good for that but then I woke up at 4am with my left arm throbbing from being in one position for, I guess, seven hours. see I stick it out there for the cats to curl around and next to or under or however they choose and I think that even my unconscious refuses to disturb the cats once they are asleep and so quite often I leave it stretched out all night long it seems. last night I flexed it back next to my body but no matter how I situated it the muscles in my upper arm were aching so loudly that I finally had to get up and take some advil. can I just say that the gelcaps are miraculous little pills? they took effect within ten minutes.

I hope they appreciate the pain I go through for them. they don't. I mean I think perhaps they would if they had any way of conceiving of it but they just think I'm a Very Good Cat Person. santiago seems to believe that all people are. jackson is quite certain that I'm the only one.

I think the truth lies in between.


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 13th, 2006 05:35 pm (UTC)
*leaves you a hug*
Jun. 13th, 2006 05:47 pm (UTC)
*picks it up, puts it in his pocket*

thanks man.
Jun. 13th, 2006 05:49 pm (UTC)
sorry your therapist is leaving town for three weeks. i can sure understand feeling stressed by that. maybe your LJ friends can sort of stand in the gap and comment more? if there's anything i can do to be helpful, please let me know.
Jun. 14th, 2006 03:46 am (UTC)
well you have lots on your plate already, but any extra comments are surely appreciated. don't wear yourself out for me though.
Jun. 13th, 2006 08:48 pm (UTC)
I think the truth lies in between.

Isn't that always the truth...

As a total aside, I have to share with you the fact that every time I read about your cat Santiago, I hear the voice of the guy from some recent soccer-star-moves-to-London-movie preview where the guy shouts, "Santiago! My boy!" He's got this very distinct accent and says Santiago sort of like "Sahhn-tyago!" with stress on the tyago, which is said really quickly like it's a single syllable (or maybe two, max) instead of three individual syllables. So, basically, in my head, your cat is a soccer star who might move to London any day.
Jun. 14th, 2006 03:59 am (UTC)
heh. that's interesting.

he's named after Benito Santiago, the Giants' old catcher. they got rid of him a couple of years ago for someone younger but he was good and had these kind of craggy good looks that were quite seductive.

I think though I liked him because he was 'old' and still playing.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )


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